Before Getting Married

The stage is set you’re walking down the aisle the church is filled with your family and friends.  Looking into the eye’s of the man you want to marry, as you’re handed off at the alter you take a deep breath.

Now is not the time to question if you’re doing the right thing!   Before you even take that walk down the aisle there are a few things you must have in order!

Many people get married but don’t do the math before they say “I DO”  and the wedding seems to be more important than the marriage.

Many women feel it’s time to get married, settle down, and have children.  Most times men feel the pressure to get married as if they don’t have an option or if  they don’t they will loose the opportunity altogether, but are not ready to walk down the aisle!

Furthermore most women in many cases feel the pressure to be wives, and mother’s before they are ready!

There is no harm in waiting long engagements are not always a bad thing, but help you focus and plan before you’re in too deep!

Every couple should have a check list and before you get married you should

Exchanging Rings

make sure that your list is in order!

KNOW who you’re marrying

many times marriages fail because they don’t see the fine print!

BEFORE YOU SAY “I DO”

• Do I want to get Married? – Many couples rush into this decision, not really evaluating the consequences. Feeling the pressure of time or friends even sibling rivalries rushing the obligation and not choice!
• Marriage should be taken seriously, it’s a commitment that shouldn’t be taken lightly. “Do I want To Get Married?” Is a question that you should ask yourself, because it’s better to wait or move on then resenting the fact you walked down the aisle!

• Who Am I- ENOUGH SAID! Many times we enter relationships as individuals but become one, losing ourselves in the process! Sometimes a little “ME TIME” is just what the doctor orders for a longterm relationship. Taking time to yourself to recharge, re-center is the best thing for a relationship!

• FINANCIAL PLAN- Money is the #1 most argued subject in many relationships, and many times the problem is that it’s discussed but not resolved! When entering a marriage three  accounts should exists!
•  1st- House money (Bills, food,repairs) Most couples don’t prepare to merge expenses and that can cause more damage!
•  2nd- Personal Money: Your spending for personal expenses (Girls or Guys night out, personal hobbies, ect.) Most couples believe in spending house money or their significant other’s money to enjoy for personal use! This can lead to more fights than needed so set a budget aside, allowing each other to spend a certain amount on personal use!
• 3rd -Saving: ”Just In Case Money” some times things just come up.  Unexpected expanding of a family, job changes, even a move, things happen and someone has to pay for it all.  Many people are not prepared to change and aren’t financially ready! The savings account should be out of  touch meaning no Checks or Debit cards to the account!

• Children- This is a touchy subject however it must be decided before you enter into a serious relationship! Knowing your partners stand on this issue early can prevent a lot of fights later!  For a lot of people this can be a deal breaker.

• Time Invested- Everything takes time and work, however like anything else you must show up! Many times relationships fail because neither partner recognizes the required  time needed to develop a long lasting relationship! Communication is the leading factor for time investment you have to talk to each other! Every now and again turn your phones, computers, and televisions off and focus on finding each other! Better to take the time now then being pushed into a crunch to  finding the time!