Dark Girls Rule

Are we in the Black Community Still Color Struck?

Light skinned girls do too…

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I come from a family where color WAS a factor. I never thought about it, never had to, the ideals were thrust upon me.  I come from a family of predominantly light skinned people.

My mother had fair skin.  I remember being really young and asking her if she were white.

The ignorance of youth.  Although I was darker than my mother, or shall I say got darker over time. My sister was darker still. And in my family she was more desired.  How’s that for a switch.

Because no matter about skin color, she had long beautiful hair and I guess in my family hair beat color.  I was teased and called names about my hair, coarser than hers, much shorter.  And in returned I let her know just how I felt about it.

We would tease each other with names such as piss color, she’d call me regarding my “yellow” complexion and I’d respond “Darkie” to her.  They’d call her pony tails and made reference to my pigtails.

I HATED THAT NAME. No wonder I grew up so hair obsessed.

In retrospect, I’m sure she took it to heart. Since there was a growing animosity between us through out the years.  But We were just doing what we were taught.  I would whip my child’ s behind today for some of the things we were allowed to get away with but I guess it was a different time.

So as child bearing years approached and we had children, I remember when my mother came to see my son, and she said “I thought I’d at least get one chocolate one” remarking on his light complexion.  It didn’t dawn on me that there was an obvious bias in the other direction.

Now I’m not saying that you should cry for me but in this world where the images of beautiful black women, are starting to once again dwindle.

And the recent article in the Psychology today, ( I won’t link to to give them more traffic) which went on to say that almost all races of women are physically attractive except for the Black woman, it leaves me to wonder if we will ever be able to be comfortable in the skin we are in if the world around us is still telling us that we aren’t good enough.

Then today I come across the link for the documentary “Dark Girls” and it made me weep inside to think that Black women still in this day and age still think like this.

The level of self hatred we have for our features and colors it’s  shameful.

We have to get to the point of learning to love ourselves in whatever color shape or form we were created.

We were made in the image of love, and have to own our own  beauty.  Because to me that’s what shines through.

And secretly as I envied my sister’s dark skin, I love the beauty that is the package I come in.

and I love it more when I see it in the beauty that I created in my child. I hope we all learn to get to this place, and stop allowing outside influencers to dictate the way we are to feel about who we are and the beauty we show to the world.

Is it still a dark skinned versus light skin thing when it comes to the sisters? Are African American’s still color struck when it comes to women or is it just Americans? Which Do you prefer? Do you still feel discriminated against? Are you a lighter skinned woman and feel a bias in the other direction? Are you a darker skinned woman and you think it is harder to date because your dark skinned?  Have You ever had a man tell you they prefer a lighter skinned woman? Are you only partial to dating people only on the basis of the color of their skin.  Have you ever had anyone do a paper bag test on you?